People end up finding their partner with either the same personality traits or same interests. When you have two people who are too different from each other the relationship will not last. Opposites do attract but only if there is attraction in something else that is greater than their opposites. There are key elements that keep a good relationship together so that it will last long.

Number one thing you need to ask about your relationship is do you have the same or similar interests or preferences? If the answer is no then next question you need to ask is do you have similar personalities. Similar personalities often clash and it may be difficult to build a sustainable relationship.

Just because you have similar interests, goals, or preferences doesn’t mean that you will automatically be compatible. The personality differences shouldn’t be too big. Otherwise you will end up with too many arguments and miscommunications. While  having the same personality type might not end up very productive or too competitive. You need just enough difference to challenge each other in a productive manner.

If you have all of these things then you need 2 more things which are common: values and common goals in your life. Common goals like material things do not count. Your common goals need to be related to who you want to become and grow together. For this reason staying together for kids or thinking that having kids will keep you together never works. Unless your common goal is to be the best parents to your kids. In that case you can use everything in your power to do it because the second you stop the only thing that holding you together will break. It will also be devastation to your kids.

Intimacy is the biggest strong hold a long term relationship has. Intimacy is a level two people achieve when they have share and grow. This is more than just information and knowing personal details. It’s about connecting sharing and developing together with your partner. Intimacy takes time and doesn’t happen overtime. It results when two people are fully investing in one relationship and they achieve a closeness.

Some Things to keep in Mind:

1.Relationships are about sharing between two people. Not one person.

2.Relationships are about growing together and sharing yourself with another.

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